America the Panacea

Prompt: To a lot of people in Africa (Sudan) America is this place of opportunity and well-being and if you go there everything will be great

This part of the discussion is particularly interesting because it reveals the nuances of the relationships between members of the Sudanese diaspora and their family members at home in the Sudan. What we learn here is, 1) the image of America, as the land of opportunity, as projected by popular media, affects the relationship between the diaspora and the homeland and 2) in Sudanese culture there is a particular emphasis placed on providing for extended family members in the same way Americans provide for immediate family members. Thus, the Sudanese diaspora in America is expected to provide for their family (both immediate and extended) back home. Further complicating the matter is the fact that the member of the Sudanese diaspora, quickly learn that the image of America, as the panacea, and the reality of living in America as an immigrant is often incongruent. A fact that the diaspora finds virtually impossible to explain to the homeland. Consequently, despite their own often precarious financial situation, members of the Sudanese diaspora are compelled to make significant personal sacrifices in order to meet the demand and expectations of their family in the Sudan, who often assume they are “rich” because they live and work in America. Why? The Sudanese definition of success is different, culturally, than the definition of success in America. As explained by our interviewee, “your success is, you have to care for your WHOLE family”.

Audio File: America the Panacea (Part I), America the Panacea (Part II)

Excerpt:

Alex:  So I guess the point that you made that I found interesting that we talked in class this week is that Carol said to a lot of people in Africa that America is this place of opportunity and well-being and if you go there everything will be great. And you mentioned you know you came here and things were still hard and you had to work to where you were today, so if you could like elaborate on that Mirage of America

“So if you live in the largest, strongest, richest country then you have to be comfortable and you have to have money. “

Ali Bashir: Ok yes first of all in the media I will talk in political terms. Like when you hear the politicians here saying we hate their way of life, this or that, none of this is true. As the American I guarantee if you go out of this country and you said you are American, you will feel proud to be an American. They really appreciate, they really love this country, they really love America, all over. Not just Africa, all the Middle East, even in Europe. Go to Germany, go to France, I’ve been to some of those countries and as soon as you say America and they look at you [Laughter]. That’s one thing you have to be clear on that one; the image of America in that part of the world is not that America has people has culture has music has a way of life, no; it’s the policy of the American government is that you guys have to play a role in that separate that point of view. Why people say this why people do this because it’s what our government is doing not what we do there and that the main focus. Unfortunately, for many Americans, young or old, their source of knowledge is not limited to American media. Like Fox News is not going to give you, there’s a lot of resources for you to get that kind of information, diverse. So you can actually see this thing from up here but unfortunately it depends on what they’re telling the media and that’s it.. so that’s one thing. Of course the way of America is the largest strongest, richest country; so if you live in the largest, strongest, richest country then you have to be comfortable and you have to have money. For us, the challenge for us is that all of those people (family back home) for us because you are here, so they assume you have that and that you’re sitting in a tub of money and there’s always a demand. Always a request, there’s always expectations from you, so you become the one that has to deal with all of the family issues, I’m not talking about the immediate family that’s not enough I am talking about all of the extended family. I swear like yesterday somebody sent me a text message it was like, five sentences, saying “you have this money so can I use about 1500 in total of your money” a text message what can I say? I need that money I’m telling you right now. But, I have to say yes, of course you can do that. So I really struggle because that’s what the expectation that I have to deal with what I deal with. And none of this is reality even if you try to explain it to them, you know “that’s not the way of life,” even if you take a piece of paper and ink and tried to say here’s what I make, you know what they say you know he makes, 15 times 10 is 150, that’s it. “Oh, 150 Sudanese pounds in one hour …. oh my god, he’s rich.” So that’s the challenge we’re facing and there’s no way we can clear that assumption to those people, there’s no way, what can you say? And we’re struggling… for you, you are American this is your life: build yourself get your education and be successful, you only you. But us no; your success is ratios, you have to care for your whole family. And if, for any reason, just say her sister is not doing well, why she didn’t help? It’s not hard, why she didn’t know, why she didn’t help? Why is she struggling, even though she has two sisters in America, one in Europe. That’s the struggle, that’s the challenge we’re facing, and it’s not an easy challenge to face.

Excerpt (Continued)

“Yes they look [like] different tribes, but it’s not different. Everything is the same, just the language.”

MAN: Tribes in Sudan, yes if you look like that, the picture, yes they look different tribes, but it’s not different. Everything is the same, just the language. When they come in the cities, they come from all over. Like in America, just come from all over. In the cities, they come together and they do the same things, together. I think that’s strength coming from the culture, because the culture is very strong and the family system is very strong. USA, here, it is very economical but there it is very poor. If you have any kind of special needs kids or adults, you have extended family, they take care of those. Here, the government pays for that and do all those programs for the people. Over there the family takes care of that. There’s no nursing homes, nobody can provide.

~End of Part I~

Tradition Vs Modernity in the Sudanese Diaspora

Prompt: In this portion of the discussion Mr. Bashir is responding to a question about what it means for Sudanese parents to send their children to American schools.

His response is informative because it reveals that issues of identity and culture within Sudanese diaspora are nuanced and experienced in different ways by members of the diaspora. What we learn in this segment is that the issues of identity are divided among generational and gender lines. On the one hand, Sudanese children are forced to balance a dual identities 1) as a member of a Sudanese family and 2) as member of American community at school among their American friends. On the other hand, the parents have to contend with 1) their own social and cultural identities as Sudanese emigrants in America and 2) they have to contend with their expectations of what they want their children’s identities to be. Thus, two related but conflicting challenges emerge. For the Sudanese children they must learn how to manage the pressures and the nuances of socially navigating their lives at home and their lives away from home, in a manner that means they are accepted by both their Sudanese family and their American classmates and friends. In other words, for the Sudanese children, the process of assimilation is learning to bend but not break both the Sudanese and American part of their identity. For the parents, however, cultural conflict is perhaps more intense because they arrive in America with a fully developed sense of their social and cultural identity. Their identities are often influenced by the strict cultural boundaries that are prevalent in the Sudan such as “tribalism”. Thus, Sudanese parents often expect their children to adhere to the same “strict” cultural boundaries that they were taught by their parents. This cultural conflict is most salient when it comes to the issue of marriage, especially among women. Sudanese parents fully expect (or more accurately hope) for their daughters to marry Sudanese men as opposed to American men.  This segment really highlights the omnipresent intergenerational conflict between traditional and modernity as it plays out within the Sudanese diaspora.

Audio File: Tradition vs. Modernity in the Sudanese Diaspora

“The division in our community is really hurting us, because if we come together we have really a very smart, talented, wonderful, people here.”

Excerpt:

Carol: I’m just going to give you a little secret about what’s going over there they’re only talking about Sudan. It’s very interesting. The whole time I’ve been there, they’ve been talking about what it was like […] no it’s just really interesting! They’re talking about how different Sudan is from here, but all of the conversation is about life in Sudan and it’s been half an hour. It’s very interesting. You know, they say it’s different, but they see all the positive, they do and it’s very interesting you’ll see […] Nobody is asking them questions, they’re just talking.

[CHATTER]

Ali Bashir: A young lady one time said: if I bring my school character to home, my parents may kill me and I cannot take my character from home to the school because I will be outcast. You know what I mean? It’s a lot of struggle and pressure on them too. Because, as a child or a human being, here is where you are, take what is good for you and continue your life, right? But here it’s two completely different cultures. You have 5 hour somewhere you deal with what they do, but you have your limits. Like she may be going with American girlfriend, like a girl, [and say] “No that’s my limit, I cannot go that far.” That’s a big thing; what to accept, what’s not to accept, what’s right, what’s wrong? Which way of life is okay, which way of life is not okay? For us, because we came here as mature adults and those things were already settled in our culture, our character. But for those other generations, the demand and the pressure is really really high on them. And the worry on the parents, it’s really, really big. And I can honestly tell you, whoever has a girl, the fear is, what if she says “Oh, I want to marry this American boy?” That would be disaster in our families and I’m being honest, yes. Because it’s not acceptable, it’s completely unacceptable. But some families, they forced to do that. Either, I am going to lose my child or accept this situation, then they are forced to accept this situation, but it’s a challenge. Because, where we come from, even I’m from a small island (Badeen, it’s like a northern Island). But, when I was growing up even my part of the island you are never allowed to get married from [another] part of the island. So the cultures were that strict. Of course, every family thinks that they are the first, and they are this and that. So, now things are changing. Like in Sudan you know people start to marry from, and this is not us; the tribe culture is terrible. We have to deal with and accept it and move on and even now as and community, as you were saying, that’s one of our struggles too. How you put them all together? How can we come as a nation? We are here together, so why do we care about what my culture is back at home, what my reference is? Like it shouldn’t be an issue, but it’s still an issue and we’re struggling with it really badly. The division in our community is really hurting us, because if we come together we have really a very smart, talented, wonderful, people here. If we all come together we could have a lot of influence in this country too. But this separation, those cultural identities which is hard to change, it’s a complete challenge for us, it’s unfortunate.

~End of Part II~

Cross-Cultural Marriage in Sudan & America

Prompt: The following transcription discuss the barriers that the Sudanese Community, as a whole, face in the United States. Specifically, a major barrier that Sudanese families are faced with is the cultural differences which exist in regards to marriage in America

Sudanese families are very traditional in their position in regards to marriage. In the Sudanese community, it is important for their children to maintain their Sudanese identity and marry somebody from a relatively homogenous background. Moreover, if their families identify with the islamic community, they must continue this lineage.

Given the fact that many Sudanese immigrants are students in the United States, this creates a very difficult situation for them to navigate. While they interact with many types of students in their schools and organizations, the expectation consistently remains that they will marry within the Sudanese community. This belief is especially prevalent for the girls of Sudanese nationality. In an earlier  transcription, Mr. Ali Bashir talks about how it would be a “disaster” for one of his children to marry outside of the community. Moreover, in this transcription, his sister describes the frequent questions regarding marriage her children are faced with when they return to Sudan. This leads us to ask some important questions as to whom people should marry and why?

Audio File: Cross Cultural Marriages in the Sudanese Community

“Our control is our religion, because we can’t marry a different religion, like Christian, and we want all these ideas and all these culture for our kids and they know that. “

Excerpt:

Alex: Yeah, question number two. So I guess like in regards to cross cultural marriage, it’s obviously a very big thing in Sudan, still a big thing in America. Although, I think America’s made a lot of progress of the last forty years or so. So I would just like to hear your thoughts on that, and like where you would like to see the Sudanese community move their stance to in regards to cross cultural marriages. Whether it be like marrying from North Sudan to South Sudan, or east to west, or maybe Sudanese to Nigerians or maybe Sudanese to Americans?

Woman: Actually, we in Sudan we have like you know, couple different families, but a couple areas. Some of them have a rule when, you get  married you have to marry from the family. A lot of them don’t have a problem to marry from other city or other tribes. They say “we are all Sudanese, there is no big difference” and some of them don’t like to marry from the West some just from the north or from the east or something. But the main thing, it’s not a big deal, not a big deal to marry from here, or from anywhere. It’s changing now. Maybe, years ago, maybe they control these things, but now it’s open, people can come in from other countries, they come from Egypt, from any other. And we have Sudanese marriage here, Americans, a lot of them marry here. I don’t know, maybe this is our culture, but is changing and it’s changing now, it’s a little bit changed. And here, when we talk with our kids and my daughter, we used to discuss about that, she was born here and she knows everything here and when we to go back home, they ask her, “Are you going to marry, you look like you’re going to marry an American” and she says “no I’m not going to marry an American, I’m going to marry a Sudanese” but you never know. Because we have a lot of people. We have found American people, they are very nice. Our control is our religion, because we can’t marry a different religion, like Christian, and we want all these ideas and all these culture for our kids and they know that. It can happen, and it’s happening now. We have a couple people who is married Americans